Well, I amuse myself

I always like to see where people go when actually given an opportunity with this opener.

I mostly end up underwhelmed, but sometimes manage to give myself a giggle.

Stalker Potential

You all see that, right? Please tell me it doesn't sit well with you either. Physically obsessed? What does that even mean?! I'm getting horrid images of some greasy creep literally stuck to my back like some horny, weighty barnacle of grossness. Whatever he means, this message made my body want to shit that shit down. My knees are so jammed together right now, I may actually become a pissed off mermaid.

Calm down, mate. Sheesh.

Exhibit A

Hello puny humans!

I thought I'd use this plucky, young gentleman's opening gambit to set the tone with my first post, on this, the maiden voyage of documentation of my adventures in singledom.

So, do you shave your pits? I mean, this should obviously be the most important piece of information you need to uncover before meeting someone. I know that I definitely shave my pits. I also squirt lube down the sides. I definitely need to make sure that our values on combat align. If he loses, I don't want him to have anything to grab onto when scrabbling to escape Enid the pit monster.